“It is a great tragedy to have the experience but miss its meaning.”

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THE INTIMATE MAN: Genuine Intimacy for the 21st Century Male

Written by John Howard Prin, LADC


John is conducting a survey of male participants to gain insight into thoughts on male intimacy. We invite you to participate and share your experiences. Women are also welcome to participate, but we ask that you respond based on your knowledge of the man (or men) you have in mind, as all questions are male oriented. Thank you for your time and participation.

Click here to participate in John's Survey


Why is a book on intimacy necessary for men in the 21st Century?

Without intimacy, men miss half of everything life offers. John realizes that men don’t easily use the word intimacy, but he believes that they do want the feelings intimacy affords. John says, “I’m writing this book to show the tens of millions of men locked in their prisons of hidden feelings that they are missing much of what life has to offer—and there is a way out.”

Having led hundreds of therapy and 12-Step groups, John has observed the sad reality that many of today's men live with only half of life's feelings and "soft" emotions available to them. These are everyday guys who want happier lives, and to feel comfort, bonding, and appreciation—but they are ill-equipped or unsure how to do so.

Born to Bond

When John facilitates men's groups and the topic of intimacy comes up, the men commonly express one of two reactions: 1) a blank stare or 2) a shocked look that conveys, "WHAT are you talking about?" Once he explains how intimacy involves being vulnerable and sharing tender/sensitive feelings, the first group frowns in confusion, while the second group protests, "No way! Not going there!"

Much has been written lately about the cultural shift of empowering women that is affecting how society looks at men differently than a few years ago, and how men actually feel threatened about that shift relative to their job, community, and most of all at home and in their relationships.

John says, “No more hiding one’s head in the sand. This shift isn’t going away any time soon.” John’s purpose is to show men their need to understand how to change, and how it will affect their lives if they do.

“My aim? To lessen their denial as well as to help guys feel loving connections at their most profound levels." How? By offering insights, methods, and shifts in attitudes that they can use to overcome the void within them. Then the emotional deficit they feel weighing heavily on them can begin to crumble and fade. Practicing new choices eventually "re-wires" the men's “be-tough, show-no-pain” upbringings and results in richer, more satisfying lives.

  • What happens when a man who wants to live life to the fullest reaches the full potential of intimacy in his relationships? Imagine what your life would be like.
  • How close to happiness and fulfillment could you get?
  • How would intimacy—being loved and sharing love by facing one’s fears and daring to become your truest self with a trusted individual—show up in your life?

In this emotionally intelligent book, professional counselor John Prin explores our ideas about intimacy. Gone are the days when intimacy for men often meant slam-bam-thank-you-ma’am in bed or “how ya doin,’ let’s get busy” at work or play. It’s high time the old idea of men as emotional misfits morphs into men as emotional medalists. When guys experience intimacy in the powerful ways John’s research and life demonstrate, their notions of intimacy and love will be stretched and strengthened.

Who wouldn’t want that?

A book proposal and sample chapter are available. Please click here to contact John.